4 Money Mindsets & the Key to Financial Success
Imagine sitting down to watch a play. The lights dim, the audience hushes, and the first actor strides on stage, launching into a gripping murder-mystery set during World War II. But then, out of nowhere, a second actor walks on stage quoting lines from Shakespeare’s Much Ado About Nothing. As if that wasn’t confusing enough, a third actor bursts into song, turning the play into a Broadway-style musical.
What you’d get is chaos – an interesting spectacle for a few minutes, sure, but no one wants that level of confusion for the whole evening.
Unfortunately, this kind of chaos isn’t limited to theater. It often shows up in financial conversations, where each person brings their own “money script” to the table. These money scripts, formed by our early experiences and beliefs, act like the lines in a play – guiding how we think about and interact with money. The problem is, sometimes we aren’t aware of which script is driving our financial decisions. Factor in a spouse or partner’s separate money script, and money matters can quickly become difficult to navigate.
I remember a couple discussing a couch they needed to replace during one of our meetings. The husband wanted to make a quick trip to IKEA and grab the most affordable option. The wife, on the other hand, wanted to take her time and invest in something high-quality – an “heirloom piece.” The term was completely foreign to him. The idea that someone would one day cherish their old couch seemed absurd.
But for the wife, it made perfect sense. She had pieces of furniture passed down through generations, each one carrying memories of loved ones long gone. Every time she walked past the furniture, she felt connected to her family’s history. The wife loved the thought that, someday, a piece she chose might do the same for someone else.
They could afford either option. Their decision wasn’t about money – it was driven by something much deeper.
Understanding your money script and how it influences your decisions is a major key to financial success. Let’s explore the four major types of money scripts: Money Avoidance, Money Focus, Money Status, and Money Vigilance.
1. Money Avoidance: “If I Ignore It, It’ll Go Away”
Do you know someone who avoids opening their financial statements or feels guilty about their savings? That’s Money Avoidance at work. This mindset views money as a source of stress or even a moral failing—something that corrupts or taints those who have too much of it. People with this script often believe that living with less is more virtuous.
Strengths: Money Avoiders tend to be generous, empathetic, and value experiences over material goods.
Weaknesses: This mindset can lead to ignoring important financial responsibilities, overspending, or even giving away money to (subconsciously) stay at a lower economic level.
I once worked with a client, an incredibly compassionate woman, who struggled to make financial progress because she kept giving money away to family members. She believed that helping others was more important than securing her own financial future. While her heart was in the right place, we had to work together to create boundaries and a sustainable giving plan.
Tips to Try:
- Review your financial situation regularly (such as weekly).
- Consider how having more money could improve your situation or the world as a whole. Turn this into a new “money mantra” to remind you why it’s okay (or beneficial) to pay attention to your finances.
- Partner with a “money mentor” who can serve as an accountability partner or role model.
Key takeaway: Generosity is noble, but you can’t pour from an empty cup. Creating a healthy relationship with money allows you to give even more in the long run.
2. Money Focus: “More Money, More Happiness”
For the Money Focused, there’s a constant chase—believing that more money will mean more happiness. This mindset enjoys money for the fun it provides: new things and experiences. The assumption can also be that money will also solve all their problems. However, if they’re not careful, this script can stay short-term focused at the expense of long-term security.
Strengths: Money Focus can drive ambition, hard work, and a willingness to take calculated risks. Those acting out of this script can be great at enjoying the fruit of their labor and making the most of each day.
Weaknesses: However, this pursuit could come at the expense of future needs. It sometimes comes with burnout, debt, or an endless feeling of dissatisfaction. No matter how much they earn, it’s never enough.
Tips to Try:
- Delay purchasing items that you feel an impulse to buy.
- Practice journaling your thoughts related to purchasing certain items.
- Set aside specific times throughout your week to connect with loved ones.
- Donate to your favorite charity or to those in need.
Key takeaway: Wealth should support your life’s goals, not define them. If you’re constantly chasing the next dollar, take a step back and evaluate what truly brings you joy.
3. Money Status: “My Net Worth = My Self-Worth”
The Money Status mindset ties financial success to personal value. People with this script may prioritize outward displays of wealth—expensive cars, designer clothes, luxury vacations—to signal their success to others. Often, this stems from growing up in an environment where money was scarce or highly emphasized.
Strengths: Money Status seekers are often driven, motivated, and determined to succeed.
Weaknesses: The downside of this mindset is overspending, hiding financial struggles, and risking long-term stability for short-term image.
Tips to Try:
- Practice slowing down when making a purchase decision.
- Practice naming the emotions you feel when making purchases.
- Discuss your financial situation regularly.
- Make time for non-financial goals, including relationships and health.
Key takeaway: True wealth isn’t about appearances. Building financial resilience requires prioritizing long-term security over keeping up with the Joneses.
4. Money Vigilance: “Save, Save, Save”
Money Vigilant individuals value saving, budgeting, and living within their means. They are particularly focused on the protection that large savings or investment accounts can provide them.
Strengths: Higher financial literacy, strong savings habits, and financial discipline are common among the Money Vigilant.
Weaknesses: Money vigilance can sometimes lead to anxiety or excessive frugality. Even when these individuals have enough, they may struggle to enjoy spending their wealth.
One client—a diligent saver who retired early—came to me worried about spending any of his nest egg. He had worked hard to build it but felt guilty using it for anything beyond necessities. He felt bad spending on even good things like family vacations.
Tips to Try:
- Create and spend a “fun money” budget.
- Check in with a trusted advisor or friend about your spending to confirm it’s sustainable.
- Practice actively focusing less time worrying about your financial status.
Key takeaway: Saving is crucial, but so is knowing when to enjoy the fruits of your labor. A balanced approach ensures you don’t miss out on the life you worked so hard to build.
So, What’s the Key to Financial Success?
It’s not about picking the “right” money script—there’s no one-size-fits-all approach. The key is self-awareness. Understanding your dominant money mindset can help you avoid its pitfalls and leverage its strengths.
- If you’re a Money Avoider, consider building systems that help you stay accountable without feeling overwhelmed—like working with a financial advisor.
- If you’re Money Focused, think about creating non-financial goals that bring fulfillment.
- For those with a Money Status script, practice gratitude for what you already have.
- If you’re Money Vigilant, remember: Money is a tool meant to enhance life, not something to hoard.
Everyone’s financial journey is different, but self-awareness can be the compass that guides you to greater peace, security, and success. Need help figuring out your money mindset or making sure it works for your long-term goals? We’re here to help—reach out anytime.
Let’s work together to make your money mindset your greatest asset.
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